I have trouble saying no to people, even when I'm already overloaded. I'm afraid of disappointing ot

Oh, absolutely. There was a time a few years ago when a friend was moving and I was already swamped with a major project at work and a family emergency. I said yes to helping them pack and move, even though I knew I wouldn't get any sleep. I ended up being exhausted, making mistakes at work the next week, and feeling incredibly resentful towards my friend for putting me in that position. Another instance was agreeing to take on a volunteer role that I didn't have the time for. I ended up doing a terrible job, letting the team down, and feeling like a failure. It also meant I had to cut back on things I actually enjoyed doing, like my hobbies, which made me feel even more depleted.

My biggest fears are rejection and conflict. I'm terrified that saying 'no' will make people dislike me, push me away, or even end our relationship. I also fear that it will lead to an argument or a confrontation, which I'm not good at handling. I worry about being seen as difficult, uncooperative, or even rude. There's also a fear of missing out on opportunities or experiences if I'm not seen as someone who's always willing to help or go the extra mile.

After agreeing to something I can't handle, I usually feel a wave of immediate relief that I've avoided the immediate discomfort of saying no. But that's quickly followed by a sinking feeling of dread and overwhelm. I start mentally juggling all the new tasks, trying to figure out how I'll fit them in. I feel a growing sense of resentment towards the person I said yes to, and often towards myself for not being able to set a boundary. I become anxious about letting them down later, and the initial relief just evaporates.

Yes, definitely. It's much harder to say no to my family, especially my parents or siblings, because I feel a strong sense of obligation and love. Close friends are also difficult because I value those relationships so much and don't want to jeopardize them. Requests that involve helping someone move, lending money, or taking on extra work tasks when I'm already swamped are particularly challenging. Also, if someone seems really stressed or in a bind, my instinct is to jump in and help, even if it's at my own expense.

If I disappoint someone by saying 'no', I imagine they'll think I'm selfish, unhelpful, or that I don't care about them. I worry they'll get angry, withdraw their friendship, or see me as unreliable. It feels like I'm letting them down, and that's a really uncomfortable feeling. I picture them struggling because I didn't help, and then I'd feel guilty on top of everything else.